Do Work – Be Creative – Give Fully
Welcome, Maxwell! Jay is officially a big brother and absolutely stellar at it. I’ll be honest, I wasn’t sure a second baby was for us. It’s hard to think about how to share your love. Jay has been our focus for so long and although he’s growing like crazy, I still feel the need to be his protector and advocate. I think that will always be part of our mother-son relationship.
Throughout my pregnancy with Maxwell, Ben and I made it a point to include Jay as much as possible. He was part of conversations about baby; learning about the baby growing in “Katie Momma’s” (that’s what Jay often calls me!) belly and active in our preparation and nesting phases. Jay started school last fall and his independence and self confidence are soaring. I need to share a bit about all of that and I will make time soon, I promise!
A Quick Birth Story
I was scheduled to be induced but nature had a different plan. My water broke around 4pm on April 14 and after what felt like no time at all, Maxwell “Max” joined us at 12:55am on April 15. Again, I was one of the lucky ones. I chose to get an epidural (power to you women you go without!) and after a short nap, the doctor came into our room to check progress and said it was time to start pushing. About 10 minutes later, little Max was resting on my chest and Ben was cutting the umbilical cord. This might be too much information, but my body was ready and baby Max eased out without a fuss or extensive pain for me. I am so grateful for that. Those daily walks really do help!
We spent a total of three nights at the hospital. Jay joined us for his first visit on Friday after school. He brought a little bunny for Max and some flowers and balloons for me. With COVID-19 restrictions in place, we could only have two people in the room at a time. So my mom brought Jay from school, and Ben met that at the hospital entry to bring him up to our hospital room.
Jay walked in calm, collected, and excited. He said, “where’s baby?” And I pointed to Max in the bassinet. Jay proceeded to say “hi baby, see, look” as he tried to hand over the stuffed bunny gift. He then turned and gave me a big hug. The best hug in the world!
We let Jay climb onto my bed and brought Max to him. We set Max in Jay’s lap and he was so calm and gentle. He softly rubbed Max’s head while saying “hi, baby, hi baby, you ok baby.” Living that moment was amazing; and the video I captured is one I’ll cherish forever.
Jay joined us the next day for a hour or so in the afternoon. He snuggled Max, sat in my hospital bed and made the head move up and down with the remote, watched a movie, and danced to music. Our family unit felt just right.
We’ve all been home now for nearly three weeks and we are settling into a routine of sorts. Max is beginning to get the hang of sleeping at night and being awake during the day … but I am still up with him for feedings every 2-3 hours. I am nursing exclusively, as I did with Jay. Again, we are lucky in that my supply is ample and Max can latch like a pro.
Jay is just as caring, loving, interested, curious, and helpful as ever. He loves to hold Max and help with diaper changes. When Max is crying, Jay is often nearby saying, “it’s ok, baby.”
Here are a few things I’ve learned so far:
This year is the year! 50 books is the goal. Here’s what I read in 2020 and 2021.
I have some exciting news – you can easily connect your family through the power of storytelling! I Am Me is now available for purchase as a recordable, downloadable e-book through MakeMomentos.com! Yo soy yo will be available in mid-2022.
What is Make Momentos?
Whether you live thousands of miles apart or just down the street, children can listen as their
grandparent, parent, aunt, uncle or favorite family friend brings the story to life with the sound of their voice. It’s an easy-to-use platform designed for busy families looking to bridge distance and active lives with a special time of connection. Children can enjoy the customized stories anytime and anyplace. The best part is, the personalized recordings become keepsake e-books that can be passed on to future generations!
How It Works
Create your keepsake e-book in 4 easy steps:
● Record your personal introductory video message
● Narrate your e-book
● Preview your keepsake e-book
● Send it to the child in your life
It’s July 2021! What a year so far in life, work, and reading. Last year I read 46 books, just shy of my personal goal of 50. From historical fiction to self-help to fantasy, reading helps me unwind and explore new-to-me worlds and experiences. The below list includes all of the books I read between July 1 – December 31, 2021 (not including 4-10 children’s books that I enjoy reading with Jameson daily!) Here’s 2021’s Part I if you’re interested.
43. Little Bee by Chris Cleave. A second-hand bookshop find. This book reminds you that the world is a very different place for many — good and bad. “If I was telling this story to the girls from back home, I would have to explain to them how it was possible to be drowning in a river of people and also to feel so very, very alone. But truly, I do not think I would have the words.”
42. A Doubter’s Almanac by Ethan Canin. With scenes set in parts of Northern Michigan, this book was one of deep pain, high knowledge, and the thrill of the human mind and condition. It’s about striving for something and still being unable to fully grasp it. When failure outwits success every time, what do you do with your life? I enjoyed this read thoroughly. “Transire suum pecuts mundoque potiri – Rise Above Yourself and Grasp the World.”
41. Three Hours in Paris by Cara Black. So many twists and turns, some heartbreak, and a lot of she-power! “Either he’d recognize the sewer worker’s code or she’d have to move fast. In either case, he couldn’t be alone. If there was a naked man in a bed in the middle of the afternoon, there had to be a lover around.”
40. The World That We Knew by Alice Hoffman. Feeling good about reading again thanks to read 39 and this one! I zoomed through this war-based, identity-based novel and jumped into the next read with ease. ‘”That is why a mother triumphs,” Bobeshi said. “All you have to do is survive and your mother lives through you.”‘
39. Blacktop Wasteland by S. A. Crosby. Great read! After trying and failing for long to get through book 38, this was a much needed reading win. The story also brought me out of myself and forced me to view the world from a different perspective — always a good sign in a book. “Listen, when you’re a black man in America you live with the weight of people’s low expectations on your back every day.”
38. Olive, Again by Elizabeth Strout. I just couldn’t get into this book, no matter how hard I tried. I didn’t finish but got nearly there (page 167 of 289) before I moved on to a different read. “But it’s never starting over, Cindy. It’s just continuing on.”
37. The Goodbye Cafe by Mariah Stewart. A cute novel loaned to me by a neighbor. I may have to read another work by Maraih, she’s published over 40 books! To write for a living…the dream. “I guess we’re all different things to different people. … Oh well. Different environment, difference influences.”
36. The Shades by Evgenia Citkowitz. A short novel with a deep look at family, trauma, and the way some things just unravel. “As his research was teaching him, photographs were framed to create impressions; often designed to obfuscate and lie.”
35. Transcendent Kingdom by Yaa Gyasi. A powerful glimpse at upbringing, science, god, addiction, and the people who live through it all–or don’t. “We know right from wrong because we learn it, one way or another, we learn it.”
34. Exit West by Mohsin Hamid. My first read by Hamid and definitely not my last. “… and so by making the promise he demanded she make she was in a sense killing him, but that is the way of things, for when we migrate, we murder from our lives those we leave behind.” And I also really liked this bit: “… which is to say that while the changes were jarring they were not the end, and life went on, and people found things to do and ways to be and people to be with, and plausible desirable futures began to emerge, unimaginable previously, but not unimaginable now, and the result was something not unlike relief.”
33. The Bookshop of Second Chances by Jackie Fraser. A lovely read about a woman going through a wake up call in life, and how fate seems to step in at some of our lowest moments. “And I’m sorry I said all those awful things. It’s frightening to have these feelings. And I know you don’t feel the same way, so probably I should have kept all this to myself. But I didn’t . . . I didn’t want you to think that we weren’t friends because I don’t like you. I do, I really like you.”
32. The Diamond Caper by Peter Mayle. A Little Free Library neighborhood find. Fun read, a bit predictable. “I haven’t met many celebrities, but the ones I have met were so pleased with themselves it kind of put me off the whole idea.”
31. If You Follow Me by Malena Watrous. A Bluestocking Bookshop buy and solid read. It was emotional, culturally new to me, and full of love, loss, and longing. “When I wake up, the whole world has been transformed.”
Love is a book we read together.
Love is a jacket in snowy weather.
Love is a sun to brighten our day.
Love is a boat to float us away.
Love is a song we sing aloud.
Love is a wish we make to a cloud.
Love is a poem we dream alive.
Love is a verse we fight to revive.
Love is a bag of all that is right.
Love is a hand to hold at night.
Love is a shadow when we feel alone.
Love is a line held fast to a stone.
Love is a whisper of care on the breeze.
Love is a nest built high in the trees.
Love is a feeling of comfort and hope.
Love is a word we use to cope.
Love is a life in need of support.
Love is a ship awaiting transport.
Love is a source that credits the past.
Love is the future that’s coming too fast.
Love is the now and love is the then.
Love is the tomorrows we won’t give in.
Love is a secret held close to the heart.
Love is a glass—fragile from the start.
In 2020, I read 46 books, just shy of my personal goal of 50. From historical fiction to self-help to fantasy, reading helped me unwind and explore new-to-me worlds and experiences in 2020–a year of hardship, COVID-19, and the shifting to a different kind of normal. In this new year I plan to continue to read, pushing myself to seek works that challenge my worldview, experience, and understanding. The below list includes all of the books I read in 2021 (not including 4-10 children’s books that I enjoy reading with Jameson daily!)
Last year I simply catalogued my reading list, this year I am adding a quote from each work that most inspired me to pause and think, laugh-out-loud, or intentionally shift my way of seeing the world. Here’s my January 1 – June 30, 2021 completed reads list. For July 1 – December 31, 2021, follow Part II.
In 2018, I took the advice and support of colleagues, friends, and family and started a GoFundMe. In 2019, I self-published I Am Me. In 2020, I focused–I called, emailed, used Social Media, and even gave books away for free to share I Am Me with the Down syndrome community and beyond. I am happy to announce that I Am Me will be available as an English/Spanish book in 2021!
After hearing from so many of you about how the book inspires and empowers, and after dozens of requests for a Spanish translation, I am over the moon to be able to share the big news. With support from Niurka Aileen Diaz and Hayley Chase, I Am Me will be available in English with Spanish translations on every page.
Diaz and Chase worked with me to translate and enhance the musicality, cadence, and meaning behind I Am Me.
Yo soy yo, y eso es todo lo que necesito ser. I am me, and that is all I need to be.
Check back in 2021 for the re-launch of I Am Me, available in English and Spanish. Until then, take a look at this Literature Review guide by Learning to Give: I Am Me.
A few months ago I asked myself: What is something new I can do to help promote Down syndrome Awareness, inclusion, and community engagement?
Last year I self-published the children’s book I Am Me. About the book: A heartfelt and honest work that acts as a mantra of sorts for anyone and everyone, but especially for individuals who are “different” in society’s eyes. Children, parents, friends, and family of individuals with Down syndrome (or any human being) need not be afraid of the unknown or the different because we are all amazing, super, and created as who we are meant to be. It’s all about appreciating diversity AND celebrating it!
I Am Me is available for purchase on my website, Amazon, in other book retailers upon request, as well as Poppin Huis, in Holland, MI. In addition to retail sales, I put in the effort to connect with organizations like Jack’s Basket and Down syndrome Associations around the country to provide discounted books for use in celebration baskets, donor thank you gifts, and fundraising efforts.
As Super Jay Brand promises, for every book sold a donation is made to an organization that supports the Down syndrome community. In my local area, I make donations to the Down Syndrome Association of West Michigan (DSAWM). Donations have also been made to Down Syndrome Diagnosis Network (DSDN) and the National Association for Down Syndrome (NADS). In 2019, books sales and other Super Jay products allowed us to donate $1,502.28. So far in 2020, donations are topping $3,000!
How many books have I sold? As of October 16, 2020, 1,494 I Am Me books have been purchased, with just under 1,200 of those books sold in bulk at discounted pricing. I am so grateful and thankful for the love I Am Me has received. Self-publishing is a hard process, but with hard work and perseverance, and a willingness to reach out to people I don’t know to make new connections and share the message of I Am Me, I have accomplished more than I ever imagined, and there’s more to come!
How do I get I Am Me in more hands? This year I wanted to give back on a bigger level. With a few of those outreach connections I made in an effort to share I Am Me over the last year, I was introduced to a new friend with personal ties to the Red Glasses Movement. In conversations with this fellow parent in the Down syndrome community, I mentioned that I really wanted to be able to offer books for free in celebration of World Down syndrome Awareness Month. A few weeks later I was asked to submit a grant proposal!
With support from the Jandernoa Foundation, I gave away 224 I Am Me books for FREE to teachers, classrooms, and parents around the USA in October 2020!
These free books were accompanied by a reading guide (download below) and an informational postcard. Recipients were asked to provide a picture or share a note about their experience reading and sharing I Am Me.
Thank you to the Jandernoa’s for their support, encouragement, and belief in the power of a book to advocate for inclusion, community, and self-efficacy.
“You are you and I am me, just exactly how life is meant to be.”
What’s next? Maybe a new book … I’ll keep you posted!
“Thank you so much for the wonderful books you donated to our first grade students! They absolutely loved them and it was cute to watch them read along. Perfect level for a first grade shared reading. I really enjoyed your guided questions and suggested follow up activities too!” – Ms. Noel, Coopersville Area Public Schools